Do you recall our story from last September about the man with ring around the collar? That was the one from Newport Beach, California where the Costa Mesa Fire Department’s Urban Search and Rescue team was called to a hospital in Newport Beach for what the firefighters are probably hoping was just a once in a lifetime call. They used a rescue tool to remove a dumbbell ring fastener from around a man’s tool.
We don’t want anyone to think that this is strictly an American problem or that other firefighters aren’t up to a challenge like this.
We take you to the United Kingdom, slightly east of a land where the pipes, the pipes are calling. In this case it was one pipe calling one man. So much so that the pipe and the man became one. United, the man and his metal mate found their way to Southampton General Hospital.
But unfortunately in this case all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put this 40 something man back together again (which in this case meant prying them apart). That’s when the hospital’s top docs reached out to the people everyone calls when they are in a tight spot. An I can’t imagine many that are tighter than this one.
Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service bravely answered the call with seven of its best. But initially even they weren’t prepared for what they saw. We will let you read the rest of this tale of love gone very wrong from the people who are expert at discussing such delicate matters in a frank, but reassuring way. Of course I am referring to the British tabloid, The Sun, where the article is attributed, I kid you not, to a ”staff reporter”:
The crew used a metal grinder for the delicate 30-minute operation, after doctors at Southampton General Hospital tried to release him without success.
The medics failed because the restricted blood flow had caused the man to become aroused.
A crew from the Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service used the four-and-a-half-inch grinder (lucky it didn’t become the organ grinder) to cut the pipe free on Tuesday morning.
Afterwards, the patient was given an anaesthetic and although his willy was left bruised and swollen it was otherwise unharmed.
The anxious man aged about 40 failed to explain how the pipe had become stuck.
A Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service spokesman said today: “Initially the crew did not have the appropriate cutting equipment to free the man.
“It was a very delicate operation that required a very steady hand and the crew was worried about things getting too hot during the cutting.
“It’s certainly an unusual call-out and I’m sure the man won’t be getting into that situation again.”