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Fire department officials admit they can’t tell who’s having sex with who. Both sexes so promiscuous it could impact fundraising.

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A volunteer fire department is changing it’s policy and is no longer even going to try to determine who is hooking up with who as part of its very famous annual auction, a key department fundraiser. This very personal information about sex lives was something once thought vital to this event but it turns out the men involved are having sex with so many women it’s just impossible to keep good records (and the women are no angels either).

Okay, so I went tabloid on you this morning with this (it was good for me, was it good for you?). Hopefully the video above gave you enough clue before you became completely outraged that I was talking about the annual pony auction of the Chincoteague Volunteer Fire Company on Virginia’s Eastern Shore.

Denise Bowden, the department’s public relations officer, unlike me, very professionally explained to Malissa Watterson at Delmarva.com that recording lineages of  the foals as part of the Chesapeake Pony Registry has become near impossible.

But attempts at listing the direct descendants of foals has been challenging and inaccurate, Bowden said.

“We can’t be 100 percent sure who the father of a colt or filly is. Every stallion has a band of mares, and one of those mares might go off to another band and do their own thing,” she explained.

Because of such discrepancies, last month the fire company voted in favor of eliminating the pony registry.

Those making purchases at future auctions will still get a certificate showing the pony came from the Chincoteague VFC, but it will no longer list the father and mother. The fire company says this should not have an impact on the average auction winner but will be of concern to those making money through breeding.

Click here to read more details from CVFC on termination of pony registry (without Dave’s sensationalism)

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Comments - Add Yours

  • Jimmy McCommenter

    Driving me nuts, Dave

  • Michael Rinaldi

    That Dave Statter is always horsing around.

  • Legeros

    Talk about bragging about being a stallion!

  • RJ(in florida)

    You’re killing me Dave