The new STATter911.com. It’s about time!!

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Yes, STATter911.com is just hours away from a makeover. Finally!

The look and function of this site has essentially been the same since it started almost seven years ago. A lot has changed in the digital world since then, but the publisher of this rag seems to be proud of the fact that he's still stuck in 2007. I am guessing that's just a cover for his own technical ineptness.

Despite his kicking, screaming and hollering, people who are a lot smarter and brighter than he is (face it, that's pretty much everyone you know), will be taking over STATter911.com this afternoon and will have it looking a lot like the image above at some point over the weekend.

You can see this is a little more than just a haircut and some make-up. It's more like botox, a face-lift, a tummy-tuck, implants and genital rejuvenation all at once (did he really say that?). So, it will take some time. The old site will be up for a while through the weekend, but I likely won't be posting anything new after about 3:00 this afternoon. I will post any news and videos during that time period on the STATter911.com Facebook page and on Twitter (@STATter911).

The big difference between the old STATter911.com and the new version is that you won't have to scroll down through a home page full of entire stories. You will be able to find what you are looking for right in front of you.

There are three main features of the new site. At the top there will be a box rotating the five latest posts. Below that are two columns. The one on the left is STATter911.com's famous fire porn, the latest videos. The column on the right will contain the latest news stories and commentary. Obviously there will be more features, but these are the main ones to help you find what you're looking for.

The other really important part of the new STATter911.com is that it will be completely mobile and tablet friendly. I've been hearing your concerns about this for a while and I thank you for sticking with me as we worked on this transition in recent months. When I told Mrs. STATter911.com that I would now be mobile friendly, she just walked away and mumbled something like, "Mobile friendly? Right. He's not even people friendly".

You don't need to do anything new on your end to find us. STATter911.com will still be at the same address and will continue to provide the best fire videos and the most interesting fire and EMS news seven days a week.

The best way to explain what is about to happen may be this. It will be kind of like keeping all the good features of your spouse of many years … their humor, their warmth and their love … but suddenly they have the body and looks of a 20-year-old. That can't be bad, can it?